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Jerry Seinfeld Quotes
- "I was the best man at the wedding. If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?
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- "It's amazing that the amount of news that happens in the world every day always just exactly fits the newspaper."
- "What is a date really, but a job interview that lasts all night? The only difference is that in not many job interviews is there a chance you’ll wind up naked."
- "You know you're getting old when you get that one candle on the cake. It's like, "See if you can blow this out."
- "Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom."
- "Dogs are the leaders of the planet. If you see two life forms, one of them's making a poop, the other one's carrying it for him, who would you assume is in charge."
- "Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem.Maybe you should get rid of the body before you do the wash."
Check out other great comic quotes.
Latest page update: made by Farore
, Nov 18 2007, 4:21 PM EST
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Edited by Farore
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Edited by Farore
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12 words deleted
view changes
- complete history)
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